FINDING A FIXER to sell my Canadian passport when The Barnstormer account went dry was the easy part. Finding a love for European football was the hard part. I came down pretty hard on footballfutbolsoccer the other day and probably offended a lot of dyed-in-the-wool footy fans. It was nothing personal. I still maintain...
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I AM ABOUT to do two things. First, I will permanently alienate myself from the world of footballfutbolsoccer journalism by calling out this sport as the most boring sport played on a rectangular field. I will call out its players for being the weakest of all pro sports athletes. I will call out the...
Read more →Cristiano Ronaldo. Cristiano Ronaldo. Cristiano Ronaldo. Cristiano Ronaldo.Cristiano Ronaldo. Cristiano Ronaldo. Ronaldo’s hair. Ronaldo’s eyes. Ronaldo’s situps. Ronaldo’s diet. Ronaldo’s speed. Ronaldo Rondaldo Ronaldo! Ronaldo’s socks Ronaldo’s shoulders and cletes, Ronaldo Ronaldo! Ohhhhhhh Ronaldo! Cristiano! Cristiano! Cristiano! Enough with the media boner for Cristiano Ronaldo. There are eleven players on a football field. Everytime...
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SOMEONE MAY WISH to alert Europe to the existence of electricity so it may be applied to their precious football tournaments. Ukraine’s goal-line crossing shot from Marko Devic missed by the officials was but one in a long history of clutch goals missed by a referees in a competition which refuses video replay despite...
Read more →HERE’S THE LAY OF THE LAND, going into to Tuesday’s knockout matchups: If Roy Hodgson eats a cheesy bean surprise on game-day morning and French substitute and rising Newcastle United prospect Hatem Ben Arfa butters his toast with any butter substitute containing 20-30% less fat than regular butter then England will advance. If he...
Read more →LEAVE IT TO my abstinence from work and football on Saturday to miss what was arguably the best game of the tournament as Roland Gift of the Fine Young Cannibals accomplished two feats of modern scientific marvel, first by evidently fashioning a time machine to travel back to 1982 when he was 21 where he...
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